No. Anything but that feeling just going away. I didn't mean it. Don't block that one out. Please?

I am currently studying National Diploma Art and Design, in my second year specializing in Photography. I grew an interest in photography after doing a course in it during my first year in art and design. I’ve never really excelled at something before I did photography; I grew an almost instantaneous attraction to it and a real passion to learn more. I suppose with photography I lost a lot of the limitations I had when I did other forms of art, and I could really let go and produce work I am happy with. I have always been influenced by Fashion photographers, like Juergen Teller but don’t always stick to it specifically. I also have a love for kind of obscure photographers such as Aaron Hawks or Nabuyoshi Araki. I do quite a lot of research on other photographers, but mostly online. The last photography book I read was David Lachaplle’s book Heaven and Hell. I adore Lachapelle’s work, his vibrant and quirky spin on sometimes horrific subjects really attract me to his work.

During my own work, I quite often work with a small team of hair and makeup, but not always. I have recently done a commission away from college, shooting some portfolio shots for an aspiring model. I read the occasional magazine that will show work by photographers and I learn a lot about composition and positioning models from magazines. I also find modelling television programmes, such as the “Next Top Model” series, hold a lot of information for aspiring photographers.

Other interests that I have include Fashion itself and celebrity culture. Both I think are a big influence on art, since Andy Warhol. After university I would like to progress in Fashion or contemporary photography and do some advertising work.

To conclude, after taking an instant passion for photography, and quickly learning, I feel that going to university to study photography into a deeper depth, I could go as far as I wish to go with it.                    

I just. Ugh. I want cuddles. Major cuddles. Not online bullshit ones. Fucking real ones. I'm so fed up. Had such an up/down day. Crying for no reason. I'm lethargic. Upset. Needy. Ugh. So not me at all.

Argh.
I'm too tired.
Too worn out.
Too, ugh.

Lonely.
Pissed off.
Tired.
Ill.

Really hate her alot.

Who let her back in the country?

I'd have banned her.

Bitch.

Don't fuck around.

I'm out to destroy you.

Everything you love.

Everything you hold dear.

I'm going to rip it apart.

:]

Argh.

You'll just get hurt!

Serious liar. SERIOUS LIAR!

All so full of shit.

Ugh.

You're just going to get hurt.