[Death's Hellhound]'s diary

26737  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2010-12-05
Written: (5250 days ago)

Alright not to sound like the Grinch or anything but I'm not too fond of these so called holidays. I feel the loneliness most people feel on Valentines day but I feel worse on Christmas. Guess the whole Broken Home thing has something to do with it

26731  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2010-12-04
Written: (5251 days ago)

Let's play a game. If you can give me the next line of the song I put in my status you will get a sexy point!

26705  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2010-11-30
Written: (5255 days ago)

So my computer is officially restored to factory settings...meaning I lost all my pictures all my stories. Everything. Boy am I pissed off kitty

26671  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2010-11-26
Written: (5258 days ago)

Two things first a shout out to an old friend on here : STAY SAFE ON BLACK FRIDAY YOU DIE I WILL RESURRECT YOUR ASS KILL YOU AND RESURRECT YOU AGAIN!

Second

Four years later

Nothing has changed
I'm still terrified of you
I still have nightmares
Because of what you did
You've grown taller
I've grown meaner
You've grown stronger
I've grown faster
You've grown heavier
I've been training
Try it now
Nothing's changed
Or everything's changed
You've seen me fight
You've seen me blackout
I don't know what I can do
But you will die before I allow it to happen again
Four years I've feared you
It ends today

Marpsy

26610  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2010-11-20
Written: (5265 days ago)

I'm sorry I can't be what I used to be. I'm sorry that I've bled too much. I'm sorry that it hurts. I'm sorry that you look into my eyes and see only sorrow. I'm sorry I'm not the person I once was. I'm sorry you can't see the darkness in my heart. I'm sorry that it's over. Most of all I'm sorry that I don't love you anymore.
-To the dark wolf

If only you knew how much I loved you. If only you knew that I still do. If only you knew that the only thing that keeps us apart is distance. If only you knew...but it's time to move on. You will never feel the same and this tiger needs to heal her own wounds.
-To the idiot wolf

26593  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2010-11-18
Written: (5267 days ago)
Next in thread: 26601

Sometimes I wonder why I try still being friends with any of these nitwits that I graduated with. I mean honestly! One left the state cheated on me came back and the other left state rarely has time for anyone anymore. The others flat ignore me. Then there's the two or three that didn't graduate I give up on them too!

26565  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2010-11-15
Written: (5270 days ago)

Ever read something that reminded you so strongly of something in your past you almost have flashback of that event?

26544  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2010-11-13
Written: (5272 days ago)

Today was bad. I think I'm gonna cry now. I just don't have much energy

26521  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2010-11-11
Written: (5274 days ago)

I used to love you
I used to want to hold you tight
And never ever let go
That was once upon a time
You took the one thing I had left
You stole my heart
You stomped on it
And tore it to shreds
I cannot love you anymore
There's no feeling left except this bone deep chill
That makes my soul ache
That make my soul cry
From the abyss
Begging and pleading for release
Would you ask for my body too?
Would you ask for my very being?
Would you ask for my life?
You would ask for these things
And like a fool
Once I would have given them to you
But no more
I cannot give these things to you
Because I do not love you any longer
Take your sorry self away

Marpsy

26475  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2010-11-07
Written: (5278 days ago)

You ever hear a song and can mentally see a fight scene in your head? Even one totally choreographed between you and a friend?

26425  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2010-11-04
Written: (5280 days ago)
Next in thread: 26428, 26431

I have decided I am unhappy with myself and dislike how many friends that are only around for sex. Thus...I'm taking a vow of celibacy.

26422  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2010-11-04
Written: (5281 days ago)

Blood cries out to blood
Beyond the grave he calls me
To join him in the night's embrace
I cannot bear the pain of life
But I swore to live for us both
I swore to live to the end

Blood cries out to blood
Beyond the veil he screams to me
To save him from the sins
Of our parents that he must suffer
I cannot aid him and it kills me
But I swore to remain strong
I swore to atone in this life

Blood cries out to blood
Beyond this door he whispers to me
Begging me to keep my promises
Even when I waver I know
I cannot let him down
I swore to be strong
And live for us both

Blood cries out to blood
On this side of the grave I call to him
Telling him one day we'll be together again
He cannot know how much I have to fight
Fight to keep strong
Fight to stay alive and keep moving forward

Blood cries out to blood
We're two halves of the whole
Two who were never meant to be long in this world
One wounded of soul
One wounded of heart
If only we had been one
We would have been far better off

Blood cries out to blood

Marpsy

26304  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2010-10-29
Written: (5287 days ago)

Darkness swirls in my heart
Part of me is so angry
So hurt
You couldn't bother with me could you?
The one girl who was interested in you
No it had to be her
Then I take a breath
It doesn't matter
You passed me up
And now I'm better
I'm beyond those petty hurt feelings
Part of me wants to laugh
The girl you court
Doesn't want you
Just like you didn't want me
Now you're finally seeing you have no chance
And turning towards me
But I'm already gone
You wanna know why?
Cuz I realized you didn't want me
So I went elsewhere
Too bad so sad
Maybe next time you'll see

Marpsy

26281  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2010-10-27
Written: (5288 days ago)

For some reason lately I've been in a rare mood....I've been singing not because I'm depressed or pissed but because my heart is light...I started singing Broken in the middle of Drawing this morning >///////////////< doh! Oh well it was the last five minutes and only one person heard me but I swear I need a muzzle!

26236  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2010-10-25
Written: (5291 days ago)
Next in thread: 26253

I want to kinda update those people who care...I'm not yet officially dating but there's a guy on Fake (he knows who he is) who I went on a date with last night and I really really like him...I hope things work out

Also lately I've been having some issues physically and emotionally which hopefully will get cleared up soon...For those who don't know my biological mother punched me in the stomach about 3 weeks ago and since then I've been having breathing problems among other things

26189  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2010-10-22
Written: (5294 days ago)
Next in thread:

There is far too much drama on Fake. I'm leaving for a bit. To those I am currently rping with I do apologize if you have my IM please contact me I will explain further. To those who don't sorry I'll explain when I come back

26121  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2010-10-20
Written: (5296 days ago)

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: Not really

Girl: Do you want me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you cry if I left?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you live for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you do anything for me?

Boy: No way

Girl: What would you choose: your life..or me?

Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind. The reason why I don't like you is because I love you. The reason I don't want you is because I need you. The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left. The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you. The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you. The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

How I wish to god love was like that. But it isn't. Not usually. Usually it's the guy taking everything from the girl making her wish she was dead and has bled it out.

26009  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2010-10-18
Written: (5298 days ago)
Next in thread: 26045

You know you've had a rough day when at the end of the day you want to cry hysterically til it either stops hurting or you pass out. When you have spent most of your day with the boy who raped you now turned into a six foot giant you're coated in sweat from fear and then add to that two very abusive exs and you've had it. Add one more stressing person and you're in tears

25992  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2010-10-16
Written: (5299 days ago)
Next in thread: 26001

You ever go to a rock concert and come back with more on your mind than when you left? Wondering if you are addicted to a person and that you're just listening to their lies because you want them to be true even though it's impossible? Yeah that feeling. I love Skyfox but dammmit Johnny stop making me think so fucking hard

25889  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2010-10-10
Written: (5305 days ago)
Next in thread: 25890

Good news I'm not preggers. Bad news....well I'm moving with an injured shoulder what isn't bad news

25886  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2010-10-10
Written: (5306 days ago)

Just so everyone knows two things
I might be pregger I'm keeping my fingers crossed I'm not but the other thing is why this is cause for concern
I got punched in the stomach last night and since then I've been having some trouble breathing.

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