Clarity

To be able to think, see; feel with content and of knowing that "love" – not romantic love, but the love of knowing where you belong, in the scheme of things. There is a design amidst the chaos as it is - and we all have a place. Some find theirs, others don't – only the "enlightened" for a lack of a better term realise and know where they belong – do I know where I belong? I used to, but recent events have forced me to re-evaluate my self – causing me to second guess what I believed – I thought I had found it, that "love" – I was wrong, very wrong.

Like many stories it involved someone else – and surprise, surprise – it was a girl. I believed my place was at her side – it wasn't, I see that now – things that were muddled are now clearer – only through pain and desperation can you achieve absolute clarity – its very strange and disturbing when you reach that moment – just to see how low you were, how low you allowed yourself to become – I'm not talking about low as in being an arsehole to others – but to yourself, you allowed yourself to get rock bottom and it sickens and appals you when you realise that, when you see that – people say its part of being human, about learning from your mistakes – but its not – being human is realising your potential, of what you can achieve – not what you can get, selfishness is the weapon of choice for the ones who prey on the weak, they are human – but only marginally so – they are to be pitied, not despised.

The best description of clarity I have ever heard was a line in a screenplay it said:

"If - nothing we do matters, - then all that matters is what we do. 'cause that's all there is. What we do, now, today."

[Angel – Season 2 – Epiphany.]

Clarity is perception of the mind – and feeling that love. Feel it, know it, embrace it. It is bliss.

The most beautiful song i have ever heard - "Jesus To A Child"

Kindness in your eyes
I guess you heard me cry
You smiled at me
Like jesus to a child
I'm blessed i know
Heaven sent and heaven stole
You smiled at me like
Jesus to a child
And what have i learned
From all this pain
I thought i'd never feel the same
About anyone or anything again
But now i know

When you find a love
When you know that it exists
Then the lover that you miss
Will come to you on those cold, cold nights
When you've been loved
When you know it holds such bliss
Then the lover that you kissed
Will comfort you when there's no hope in sight

Sadness in my eyes
No one guessed, well no one tried
You smiled at me
Like jesus to a child
Loveless and cold
With your last breath you saved my soul
You smiled at me
Like jesus to a child
And what have i learned
From all these tears
I've waited for you all those years
Then just when it began
He took your love away
But i still say

[Repeat chorus]

So the words you could not say
I'll sing them for you
And the love we would have made
I'll make it for two
For every single memory
Has become a part of me

You will always be...my love

Well i've been loved
So i know just what love is
And the lover that i kissed is always by my side
Oh the lover i still miss...was jesus to a child

My Shoot On Wrestlemania

sorry for the rant but yet again wrestlemania is overhyped and under - no scratch that - its crap!

look at the matches - theres only ONE that id even be bothered to watch -

Ric Flair vs HBK Shawn Michaels

i mean c'mon who wants to watch

Batista vs Umaga????

Triple H vs John Cena vs Randy Orton (seriously change your first name)?????

Money in the bank? ok jeff hardy - u screwed this match , yourself and us fans

Edge vs Undertaker - hmmmm let me see who will win this one Undertaker?? Our Survey says??? Ping

Floyd Mayweather vs The Big SHow - jesus christ - is the WWE creative team really getting paid to do that job? coz it dont look like it!!!!

Finlay vs JBL - itl be an ok match - nothing spectacular with vinces annual comedy match

AHEM......................BUNNYMANIA??????????

C'mon vince where are the women who can actually wrestle?? the WWE Womens division is nothing and as a person an another website put it

"i swear Fabulous Moolah is turning in her grave at what women's wrestling has become now a days (with exception to the women of Japan and Indies"

for crying out loud - where are the decent female wrestlers? trish stratus was a good female wrestler - who else, lita - yes, victoria? yes - chyna? yes - I mean c'mon - ashley massaro? please - michelle mccool was a school teacher - beth phoenix? NO!! - kelly kelly? sounds more and looks more like a pornstar - thats just my opinion - i dont expect everyone to agree with me - im just so f**king pissed off - IM SICK OF PLAYBOY CENTREFOLDS - cant we have some decent female wrestlers?

i like christy hemme at TNA she was never given the time to develop as a wrestler - unlike trish stratus - cmon VINCE WERE SICK AND TIRED OF YOU SELLING SEX - WHEN WE CAN GET IT FOR FREE!!!!

buck up ur ideas WWE - this is why TNA is getting better - Gael Kim is a decent wrestler yet u release her because she refused to be pumped with silicone - LISTEN TO THE PEOPLE VINCE AND MORE IMPORTANTLY YOUR OWN SON!!!!!! Shane knows the biz listen to him!!!!

Thankyou for listening - or reading my rant - im just a fan whos had enough of being told what i want to watch and read

kindest regards

Renard