[Fallen King]'s diary

40722  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2017-01-01
Written: (2643 days ago)

Been a few years sense I've posted anything here. I'm beyond rarely on here so it seemed a good a place as any to just pout out my soul. I suppose were to start. Between trying to keep my family together dealing with my gf which was my fiance develop feelings for another man. Feeling no desire from her anymore. No man should ever have to ask or beg for his old lady's attention. I suppose I'm tired and I'm hurting. I miss the old times when I felt like I ment something. But that's in the past and people change. I'm not perfect far from it. I guess maybe I need to except I'm not good enough my little girl deserves both her parents cause nothings gonna ever get better. It's already been over a year. I guess making someone your world is a mistake cause it won't stop feeling like I'm broken. She's laying next to me even touching her and I feel so distant so alone.it sounds sad but it's one of those times I just wish I could close my eyes and never wake up again. But it was nice to vent I suppose I chose here cause it's pretty dead always but oh well life is life

34792  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2012-08-20
Written: (4238 days ago)

its a sad fact to watch a love story in any form and wish to be desired like that. seeing two characters in love holding tight to one another never wanting to let go. its a sad fact that this is the real world. if your not perfect your not excepted your alone. no matter how much you desire or wish it work for it. it all ends the same you wake up to nothing and no one. Theres no place for what i have to offer anymore. im flawed and living a dream. its only in dreams and stories someone can truely love someone to the point they'd die for them or for love. that someone can only have eyes for one person anymore. love is only a word now a silly stupid word for those with a false hope theres something better waiting for them. the only thing waiting for us is nothingness. i just wish i understood why i keep figting for something i know really isent there... maybe im just a bigger fool then i truely thought i was.

34579  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2012-07-29
Written: (4260 days ago)

ok i give up on the drinking one bottle down and nothing grrr

34578  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2012-07-29
Written: (4260 days ago)

wow watching real steel and drinking some wine bottle almost gone and nothing what a great few days... *sighs* and to top it off lost the wallet somewhere out of town when can a guy catch a break? sometime please..

34568  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2012-07-27
Written: (4261 days ago)

im drinking tonight i wont be on text me if you got the number

34450  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2012-07-21
Written: (4268 days ago)

Might be stepping away from fake for a while. i have yet to deside my plan of action just a fore warning to those who care to know

34291  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2012-07-12
Written: (4277 days ago)

"To the Nice Guys"
To every guy that regrets hurting or losing her.
To every guy who knows which girl he wants.

To every guy that's said, "Sex can wait."

To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful." (instead of Damn ur hot!)

To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town (or across the state) to see her.

To every guy that gives flowers and a card when she is sick.

To every guy who has given her flowers just because.

To every guy that said he would die for her.

To every guy that really would.

To every guy that did what she wanted to do.

To every guy that cried in front of her.

To every guy that she cried in front of.

To every guy that holds hands with her.

To every guy that kisses her with meaning.

To every guy that hugs her when she's sad.

To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all.

To every guy who would give their jacket up for her.

To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe.

To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours just to see her for ten minutes.

To every guy that would give his seat up.

To every guy that just wants to cuddle.

To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what.

To every guy who told his secrets to her.

To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and every breath.

To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one.

To every guy that believed in her dreams.

To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them.

To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams.

To every guy that walked her to her car.

To every guy that wasn't just trying to get laid.

To every guy that gave his heart.

To every guy who prays that she is happy even if you are not with her.

Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore... And because of this, there are not many left out there...

34258  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2012-07-09
Written: (4279 days ago)

Ive really stopped lately and looked at my life, ive put so much of my own wants aside handling issues within my family that its become left on me and sadly stated so to me by my elder sister. you want something more but what women in there right mind wants a guy who lives with his mother. no matter the reason thats whats viewed. or seen as (unreliable) even though in truth im here cause she was sick and out of all 3 of us kids i was the only one who could come home. my bothers out of state completely cut off due to his work and my sister has a family and a husband of her own. im 26 gonna be 27 this year and got nothing to show for anything i ever have done, im truely starting to believe nice guys do finish last, that chivalry and everything i know is just wrong. doughting everything thing people and dont get me started on my relationship him AkA "God" bad things happen hes testing you. god things happen "he works in mysterious ways" well im tired of being tested and im tired of watching everyone around me thrive and i left on the damn side line. somethings gotta be done is all i gotta say or atleast changes. idk someone will have a good laugh at this

34255  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2012-07-09
Written: (4280 days ago)

well a good nights sleep always makes everything better. well its when you dont wanna crawl your ass out of bed it sucks.

34222  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2012-07-08
Written: (4280 days ago)

You know when is enough enough. When do you know to just walk away. im here day after day and i dont know why. it use to be a small sense of comfort in a weird way. but not so much anymore. here or not i feel alone so i need to deside if its even worth staying.

34215  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2012-07-08
Written: (4280 days ago)

Please Forgive Me lyrics
Songwriters: Adams, Bryan; Lange, Robert John Mutt;

It still feels like our first night together
Feels like the first kiss
It's getting better baby
No one can better this
Still holding on
You're still the one
First time our eyes met
Same feeling I get
Only feels much stronger
I wanna love you longer
Do you still turn the fire on?

So if you're feeling lonely, don't
You're the only one I'll ever want
I only want to make it go
So if I love you a little more than I should
Please forgive me, I know not what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me, this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me, if I need you like I do
Please believe me (Oh believe it), every word I say is true
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you

Still feels like our best times are together
Feels like the first touch
Still getting closer baby
Can't get closer enough
Still holding on
You're still number one
I remember the smell of your skin
I remember everything
I remember all the moves
I remember you yeah
I remember the nights, you know I still do

So if you're feeling lonely, don't
You're the only one I'll ever want
I only want to make it go
So if I love you a little more than I should
Please forgive me, I know not what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me, this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me, if I need you like I do
Please believe me (Oh believe it), every word I say is true
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you

The one thing I'm sure of
Is the way we make love
The one thing I depend on
Is for us to stay strong
With every word and every breath I'm praying
That's why I'm saying

Please forgive me, I know not what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me, this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me, if I need you like I do
Babe believe it, every word I say is true
Please forgive me, if I can't stop loving you
No, believe, I don't know what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you
I can't stop loving you



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EHAo6rEuas&feature=related

34212  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2012-07-08
Written: (4280 days ago)


There was a blind girl who was filled with animosity and despised the world.

She didn't have many friends, just a boyfriend who loved her deeply, like no one else.

She always used to say that she'd marry him if she could see him.


Suddenly, one day someone donated her a pair of eyes.
And that's when she finally saw her boyfriend.

She was astonished to see that her boyfriend was blind.

He told her, "You can see me now, can we get married?"

She replied, "And do what? We'd never be happy.

I have my eye sight now, but you're still blind. It won't work out, I'm sorry."

With a tear in his eye and a smile on his face, he meekly said, "I understand. I just want you to always be happy.

Take care of yourself, and my eyes."

 The logged in version 

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