[Whistler]'s diary

37187  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2014-06-30
Written: (3587 days ago)
Next in thread: 37188

Just a bit I need to get out

Wow. Don't ya love walking up to a group of people and hear me all laughing n yada yada and the moment they see you they get that awkward silence about them then just small what would be insignificant comments just totally tells you they was talking bad juju bout you. The real knee slapped is not only the vibe of the group is shoving you off but when one person turns to another( whom is either friend or significant other) and openly asks them if it's still ok to do something that was originally an agreement between you and that person not anyone else? Then they give ya the wtf look, you don't even have to see it to know they doing it cuz your walking away without saying more than a couple words? I mean seriously. I understand that my situation isn't the greatest and all but at the same time these people said they would help me when I need it but I'm getting to the point of telling everyone to fuck off with their help I can do bad enough on my own without all they Snyder comments and shit talk behind my back to just add to everything else that is already bogging me down. Brings back the whole "with friends like these who needs enemies". It totally be different if I had asked for the help, but they offered it. There was no hinting or egging or asking, they offered it and now all alienated by the fact I took a couple of them up on the offer. Hell one of them I took them in off the streets, provide, housing, food, and pretty much everything that they needed to get on their feet and now they blabbing prolly way more of my business out there than what's needed for people to know. I'm a private person. If it's not my business I stay out and if it's not my business and I'm brought in I don't talk about it to others and shure as fuck if it's my business it's a need to know basis. Like damn, everyone has problems and if we don't help each other then no one is going to get anywhere. If I was as selfish and snobby as these folks.... Well I dunno, I'm not and never have been so can't really comment on it but on the receiving end of this crap it's just shitty and I couldn't see treating anyone that way. I'm bout to have a snapping point and no one round here is going to be happy. I'll keep my money, food, and help to myself and only on emergency basis will I give a damn with this lot. I'll start forking out my cash to a cab for rides and just not have a babysitter for anything. Their gas, pop, food, babysitter, ect isn't going to be me anymore. I don't have time for such petty bullshit from people and I'll be damned if I'm going to tolerate being treated this way all for the sake of being a good neighbor, friend and so on. I have bigger problems that need my attention and even bigger issues I need to address. The biggest being I have court in 18 fucking days and need to hound the lawyer into talking to me and figuring out the game plan as if I loose this shit. I'm done. My reason for living will be gone and that be the end of it. I loose this shit and it's a shot drop with a sudden stop for my stupid ass.

37101  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2014-05-26
Written: (3622 days ago)
 The logged in version 

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